I just want to wish everyone a Happy New Year. This year has been a good year. Alot has happened, some happy things and some sad things. But even through the sad things I have grown in the Lord. I just want to say that sometimes the Lord places things into your lives that are sent to help you to grow in Him. At the time it is hard to imagine getting through it, but somehow you have the strength to get through it and come out a stronger person. I know that there are some things that happened this past year that looking back now I know without the Lord I would not have handled it as well as I did. The Lord is so good. His grace is sufficient. He never gives you more than you can handle. My New Year's Resolution for 2010 are to read my Bible more, spend more time in prayer, begin to memorize more Scripture, and meditate more on the Scriptures. I know that I do not do enough for the Lord, but my goal for this coming year is to work my hardest to be a better Christian and do more work for Him. All my life I have heard about the great faith of the Christians of old, they sacrificed so much of their time and of their energy for the Lord, to plant the seed of salvation and to grow closer to the Lord each day. This type of life is so foreign in today's society. There are still some Christians like that, but not many. I hope to one day be considered as one of these sacrificial Christians, who gave all to the Lord and held nothing back. "May the Lord Find Us Faithful" and may we have "A Passion for Thee" as the songs say. I hope that everyone has a Happy New Year.

The All Seeing Eye of the Lord

It always seems that I am apologizing for not blogging as often as I should. Well this post is not any different. Sorry. Now that I have gotten my apologies out of the way, I just need to say that I am so happy that Christmas vacation is here at last. I thought that I would never get through finals week alive, but I did and with good grades to boot.

Right now I have something that is majorly upon my mind that I would like to share. One never knows when his/her actions are influencing others around them. Just before Christmas, I received a card from a guy at my school. In the card the guy thanked me for being a good Christian witness at school. He told me that he really had been going through alot of battles in his life that nobody knew about. Also, he told me that my standing up for the Lord gave him courage to do the same, and helped him to trust in the Lord during the battles that he is facing. This card completely touched my heart, for sometimes it is hard to stand up when you do not think you are making a difference. This card truly showed me that someone is always watching, whether it be someone around me or the Lord Himself. Our actions and our words greatly influence others, whether we choose to acknowledge that fact or not. My desire is to influence those around me for good, although I do not always succeed in this area. Most of the time we do not even know the influence that we are making upon others lives. We as Christians should guard ourselves that what we do and say is Christ honoring. For you never know when what you say and do will help a sinner come to Christ or a struggling Christian come through a trial in their life. Not saying that we are the one that is helping them, but the Lord working through us. We must be willing vessels for the Lord to use. Without the Lord I know that I would not have helped my friend at school, but the Lord working through me. For I could not see what he was going through outside of school, only the Lord can see everything. So many times in my own life I will be going through a trial, and someone will do or say something that greatly helped me. I know that they did not know what was going on in my life, but the Lord did and used them to be an encouragement to me. The Lord works in mysterious ways, and He is so Good.

My Thankful List

Here is just a piece of my Thankful List. This does not even come close to everything I am thankful for. God has been so good in my life.

1. My family(mom, dad, and brother)
2. My pastor
3. My salvation
4. The Bible
5. My Friends
6. My home
7. My car
8. A loving church family
9. Prayer
10. Praying family and friends
11. God's forgiveness
12. God's mercy and grace
13. God's patience
14. God's unending love
15. Warm clothing
16. Books =)
17. Breath
18. My sight
19. My hearing
20. Freedom
21. The military
22. To live in America
23. My phone
24. My grandma
25. Those who have had a great spiritual impact upon my life.

It is never right to do wrong. Sometimes I find in my own life that I do not always heed this truth. Justifying wrong is never right, and under no circumstance will the Lord's will be doing something that is wrong. I have been told this over and over again, and I heed it when it comes to things that I absolutely know are wrong. But sometimes our judgement is not so sharp, and we feel that we must do something in order to please others. Still it is not right though. The Lord will always bless His children when they do what is right and good. Doing right may not always be easy, but in the end happiness will follow. Doing wrong many times is easier, but in the end we feel bad about ourselves. We know that we have let the Lord down when we participate in sin. I just want to say that the Lord is good. He has been so good to me. I do not deserve for Him to be so good and so kind to me. I fail Him so often yet He always loves me the same. As Breakin Ground's song says, "So even when I'm at my worst, He sees me as His best."

Well I have been telling people that I would update my blog for about two weeks now. Well I have done so. Bye. Just kidding.

Here lately I have been thinking alot about the conversations that we engage in. How many things do we say each day that have no significance? How many people do we gossip about in a single day? How many things that do we complain about? How many discouraging instead of encouraging words do we say to others? These questions have been going through my head alot here of late. I try to be very conscious of everything that I say, but sometimes that does not always happen. My pastor in his message yesterday, said something that I really liked and am going to try to make a habit of. Whenever we have a mean thought about somebody, instead of saying what our thought was to someone else, we need to say something nice about that person. Or whenever we start to complain about something, we need to say something positive instead. We need to have good things to say. Words are more deadly than anything. That saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me" is not really true. Words can hurt you. Not to say that we should wear our feelings on our sleeves, and take offense to everything anybody says to us. We cannot control what everybody else says and does, but we can control what we ourselves say and do. I do not want anybody to say that I have hurt them with my words. I want to guard my tongue. If we are to be witnesses for the Lord, what we say is a big part of accomplishing that task of being a good Christian witness. I would hate for my words to hinder someone from accepting Christ as their Saviour. Also, every word that we say we will be held accountable for someday.

"Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh. Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is , there is confusion and every evil work. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that a make peace."
--James 3:10-18

The Bible truly is an amazing book. No matter how often this great Book is read it will read the same each time its read, but will have new messages revealed to the reader as the reader digs more into what it says. Until just recently I did not know the full definition of meditating on the Word of God. In my devotions I found out what it is:

"Anyone who knows how to worry knows how to meditate. A worrier takes one thought (for example, "I just know I'll never get married" or "I'm afraid my parents will never let me have a close friend") and looks single-mindedly at that thought from every possible angle, examining every possible implication and application of that thought to him personally. Worriers are skilled in the meditation process but are meditating on the wrong kind of thoughts.

Biblical meditation involves the same process, but reflective thoughts must be on the truth from God and not on a lie from our own heart or from Satan. We must start with truth revealed to us from the Word. Then we need to examine it from every possible angle, asking God to show us its implications and applications for us and our relationship with Him. We will "bend over to see it better." For some that will mean looking up verses in commentaries or studying the individual words in Bible dictionaries or word studies. We may need to look up cross-reference to other passages in the Scripture that shed more light on a passage.
Someone who knows Greek or Hebrew will examine the words in their original languages.

Above all, biblical meditation will mean an ongoing interaction with God Himself, asking Him to reveal to us the truth He wants us to know and practice so that our fellowship with Him can increase and our fruitfulness for Him can grow. He will most often respond to us first by convicting us of unconfessed sin. "The entrance of [His] words giveth light"(Psalms 119:130) and the light will expose our sin. Notice the sequence in Proverbs 1:23: "Turn you at my reproof: behold, I will pour out my spirit unto you, I will make known my words unto you."

Remember, the aim of this meditation is to help us behold our God and think like our God so that we can know and therefore "do those things that are pleasing in his sight"(I John 3:22). The barriers that hinder our fellowship with Him must be removed before He will reveal His words to us."

The passage in James 1 that exhorts us to look into the "perfect law of liberty" says we are to continue in it. The next question might be "How long do we continue peering intently into the Word?" The twofold answer is found in the next phrase: "He being not a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work." We are to continue meditating on the Word as long as it takes to make sure we do not forget what we have heard. That often means meditating on the same passage, studying and reflecting on it , for several weeks. That certainly doesn't mean we cannot read other passages or keep up with a "through-the-Bible-in-a-year" schedule, but it does mean that our focused attention must continually come back to the passage at hand until it becomes a permanent part of our thinking." (Berg, 105-106)
- "Changed Into His Image"
- By Jim Berg

This is an excerpt from Jim Berg's devotional. This fully helped me to understand what meditation truly is. I have been meditating on James and am finding so many things that I knew were there but are just now really becoming real to me. Each day I am reminded of the same truth but each day I learn how to master it or I must keep myself from participating in something, until it becomes easier and more ingrained into my everyday thought patterns. This is just a thought. Something that I have been thinking about, and something that I just recently learned.

"Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My bretheren, these things ought not so to be. Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?"
-James 3:10-11

"Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up."
- James 4:10

This particular verse has been on my mind alot lately. Sometimes we feel like we are so above others, that we are so much more spiritual that others. We will never fall into sin like others do. Well I am here to tell you that the Devil wants to see us fall, and when we are puffed up about ourselves that is the best time for the Devil to put something in our path to cause us to fall. I truly want to be humble. Paul speaks about how he is the chiefest of sinners. Paul was humble, he knew that he was flesh, and sinful. That he needed a perfect, Savior to save him from his sins. Only when we recognize who we really are, can we begin to fully be humble. Without God we are nothing, we can do nothing. Humility is a big characteristic to a truly Godly Christian.

Speaking in front of people is something that I have never really been comfortable with. Today while in U.S. History class the teacher decides to call on me to answer questions about the material covered the night before. I personally feel that the man knew that I was nervous, and that he decided to play with it. He would ask me questions that I answered to the best of my ability, but he would word strangely on purpose to confuse me. I am not good at thinking when asked a question on the spot. All during class he would ask questions directed to all of the students, and I would be the only one answering them most of the time, correctly too. But when he would direct a question directly to me I would freeze. One time he asked me a question and I answered it, and he laughed at me, causing the whole class to laugh.

Another time today I had to speak in front of my class today, and that was during Speech. I was the second person to speak, because I volunteered to be one of the first ones to speak. I wanted to get it over with, and the teacher normally grades easier on the students that go first. All the other student that get up to speak later during class already know what the teacher expects out of them. Well I got up to speak and I did a pretty good job of it, except that my voice shook. I made it through my speech, but right when I finished I noticed that my mouth felt like I had chalk dust all in it. My mouth was the dryest that I ever remember it being. Thankfully I keep a small bottle of water in my purse just for such emergencies. When I got back to my seat a wave of relief passed over me. All of that worry and loss of sleep was over something that only lasted 2 to 3 minutes, and just as quickly as I had started I was finished. I did ok and I did not get sick so I guess I can get through the rest of the course. I hope.

Just for Fun

Something that I found on someone else's blog that I thought would be interesting to fill out.




-What are your nicknames? Care Bear( by most people), Callie(my Dad), Callie Marie(my dad), Pumpkin, Punky, Carrots, Ms. Carrots, Carrie Anne(my friend Ashley), Cavis(my brother), Cat(my brother), Blondie, and Peaches( actually this is my newest nickname. My pastor one Sunday morning was calling on me and a friend to sing. He said, "Well I really do not know what to call this new group. How about Peaches and Cream." It stuck.)



-What is your favorite scent? Cool Water( by Calvin Kline) or Fresh Cut Roses



-What is one place you've visited, can't forget and want to go back to? Charleston, South Carolina



-Do you trust easlily? It really is according to what you mean by trust. Do I trust people that I just meet. No. Do I trust people to tell me the truth. Yes. Many people play pranks on me all the time. They will tell me something and I will believe them, and in reality they are pulling my leg. I am very gullible.



-What is your favorite flower? Daisies

- Do you generally think before you act, or act before you think? Most of the time I think before I act. Many times before I do or say anything I roll it over in my mind a dozen times before I actually say or do it.

- What is the last song that got stuck in your head? A Few Good Men :)

There are a few of the questions.

Search Me

Search Me

Search me O' God and know my heart

Try me and know my thoughts

And see if there be any wicked way in me

And lead me in the way, lead me in the way

Lead me in the way everlasting

You have known me, you have known me

My downsittings, my uprisings

You understand my thoughts from afar

You know all my ways, you know all my ways.

While attending Pensacola Christian College, I learned and fell in love with this song. During prayer group and during hall meeting all the girls in my dorm would sing this song. Each time it was sung it really challenged me.

In this song it talks about the Lord knowing us. He knows our downsittings and our uprisings. Also, he understands all of our thoughts, and he knows all our ways. I do not know about you, but that really makes me feel ashamed. To know that someone knows all about me. We can not hide anything from God. He sees everything that we do, He hears everything that we say, and He even knows everything that we think. It makes me ashamed, and it also makes me want to watch myself more closely. We may be able to hide things from our friends and our families, but we cannot hide things from the all seeing eye of the Lord. The thing that amazes me is that even though the Lord knows all about us He still loves us. I fail Him each and everyday, but yet He still loves me the same as He did yesterday, last year, and 20 years ago.

I also love this song, because to me this is a song of prayer to the Lord. I want so much to do what the Lord wants me to do. When singing this song I sing it as a prayer to the Lord to search me, and see if there is anything in my life that I need to turn away from or place into my life.

This song was actually taken out of Psalms 139. Another thing that is mentioned in this chapter that is not in the song is that the Lord's thought's of each of His children are precious. I just love that. The Lord's thoughts of me are precious. As my pastor says, " That is enough to make one want to run around the church praising the Lord ( something like that)." Thank you Lord for having precious thoughts about me.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart, try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

- Psalms 139: 23-24

" O LORD, thou hast searched me, and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought from afar off. Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways."

-Psalms 139:1-2

"How precious also are thy thoughts unto me. O God! how great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee."

-Psalms 139: 17-18

I Will Trust You Lord

I Will Trust You Lord

Verse 1

Its funny how we do it, the plans for our lives

We plan for success and try to pass the pain right by

But it just doesn't work that way, God has a different plan

He works in ways we never see, beyond the scope of man

Chorus

When the journey takes a detour unexpectedly

And I try to accept and understand what it all means

When I'm pressed to show the world, what I really believe

I will trust you Lord

When my heart begins to faint, because I've seen my life's afraid

And my soul cries out, Oh Lord how long can I keep this at bay

In the fiercest part of battle when my feet don't want to stay

I will trust you Lord, with my life

Verse 2

I may not understand it, and even question why

What good will ever come from this? Has even crossed my mind

But God's teaching me to trust Him more, as He works His will in me

I rest securely in His care, and surrender sure is sweet

This song has meant alot to me here lately. Many times in our Christian lives we do not always understand why the Lord sends difficult circumstances into our lives, or why the Lord takes things that are special to us away. We plan for our lives to be just perfect and often are disappointed when something enters or leaves our lives that disrupts our vision of how things are suppose to go. We often question the Lord, and become a little bit aggravated at Him for messing our lives up. But He knows what is best for us, even when we ourselves do not understand. He sends a trial into our lives, and the first thing that we do is begin to tell Him that He is messing things up, and we grow angry, and our fellowship with Him becomes strained. Instead we should just ask the Lord to help us get through it, for His glory and our good. Also, we do not always understand why the Lord withholds things from us, that we have prayed for and longed for, for a long time. We envision our lives a certain way, and we pray that the Lord will make it that way in our time. We do not want to have to wait on His timing, we want it now and do not want to wait for it. But the Lord has a vision for our lives also, and His vision is far better than we could ever have imagined for ourselves. Our lives are not our own, we belong to the Lord. We think only about what will benefit ourselves, but the Lord wants to use us for His glory. Each one of us is used everyday by our Lord to influence those around us, whether we influence for good or evil is entirely up to how we handle what the Lord sends our way. God can use our trials to influence others. Through our trials others can see the Lord doing a great work through us. If we lean on Him when we do not understand then He can give us strength to get through anything. He is making us more like Himself when He sends trials into our lives, and if we withstand the testing then our pot that He is molding will become more beautiful and precious to the Potter. Just trust the Lord for He knows what is best. We will have joy and peace if we leave our lives in the Master's hands to do with as He sees fit. Read the song again, and think about what you are reading more closely.

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."
Proverbs 3:5-6

Every weekend for the last three weekends I have went out of town. Frankly, I am quite tired, but on each trip I have had a great time. The first weekend I went to MacDonald, Tennessee to a Youth Meeting at Mineral Park Baptist Church. I had a very good time and was very uplifted by the messages. The second weekend I went to Murfesburro, Tennessee to a Child Care Convention. I would have to say that sometimes spending an entire weekend with your coworkers can be exhausting and frightening. All have the priviledge of getting to know each other too well. Lol.



This past weekend I went to St. Stephen, South Carolina to Life Baptist Church, where Bro. Alfred Willis is the pastor. This church was hosting a Camp Meeting. I had a very good time and was greatly encouraged and revived. All of the preachers brought great messages. Two of the messages though greatly helped me . One was on getting Christ on your life. All of God's children need to get Christ on their life. The preacher preached out of Mark 11:1-11. Jesus had told His disciples "...Go your way into the village over against you: and as soon as ye be entered into it, ye shall find a colt tied, whereon never man sat: loose him, and bring him. And if any man say unto you, Why do ye this? say ye that the Lord hath need of him; and straightway he will send him hither. And they went their way, and found the colt tied by the door without where two ways met; and they loose him."(Mark 11:2-4) Young people brought up in Christian homes and in church today are like that colt that has a lead about their neck that binds them to their parents and to those in authority over them. They are where two ways meet. Their parents are trying to teach them the ways of God and to tell them that doing what the Lord wants them to do is the right way, the way that will bring them joy, peace and happiness. But they keep watching the world as it passes by down those ways that meet, wanting so much to be let loose to wander and follow all those who are straying from God. Well one day the Lord called for that colt, He wanted that colt to carry Him through Jerusalem. Christ had a special job for that colt to do. If that colt had been loosed of its lead it would not have been ready for the Lord to use. The same applies to young people if they are participating in the things of the world and wandering away from what they have learned from their parents and their pastor, then they will not be in the place where the Lord needs them. He has a special plan for their lives that requires them being useable for Him.



Another preacher brought a message about a Match Made In Heaven, about Issaac and Rebekah. This message greatly encouraged me to be all I can be now, before the Lord sends me someone. So that when He does send him into my life I will be ready. I must just be patient and wait on the Lord's timing. I must trust the Lord also. I try very hard to trust the Lord in this area, but sometimes I struggle and lean on my own understanding. " Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding."(Proverbs 3:5) I read this verse quite often and say it aloud to myself to try to drill it into my head, but somehow I keep trying to rush the Lord. He knows what is best and He knows my future. He is working things out for His glory and my good. He is working on something and His vision of it is better that I have envisioned it to be. Also, I know that the Lord is teaching me to patience. Someday I will look back on these things and laugh a my silliness, but at the moment it is hard. A good friend has been encouraging me in my trusting, and has really been a blessing to me.

Trying to trust the Lord, and trying not to lean on my own understanding.

Just a quick post to say that I am still here. I said that I would try and remedy my lack of blogging and here it has been about 4 months since I have blogged. Pitiful I know. Well this post is not to say that I will do better, but to inform people that I am still here.

Summer has almost come and gone and I am sad to announce that school is coming upon me at too fast a pace. I have not been idle this summer though. I have been very busy working and do activities with our church. This coming Friday I will be going to South Carolina to Bro. Alfred Willis' church to a camp meeting. I am quite excited about going. Hopefully many people will be helped through the preaching.

God has really been working in my life lately, in the area of trusting Him. Sometimes my will is so hard to break, that I often do not listen and obey the Lord's plans. I do know though that the Lord has really been teaching me much and molding me into the vision He has of me. To be more like Him. A prayer of mine was answered just tonight. I asked the Lord to teach me how to love Him more and to help me to love Him more. He answered me tonight at church when a man in our church began to testify. In the Bible the Lord tells His disciples that if they love Him that they will keep His commandments. I have known for a long time that love is not just a feeling but an action. If you truly love someone you will carry it out through actions of thoughtfulness and sacrificing of your own time, energy, and self. Sometimes it is hard to keep His commandments, because our flesh does not want to yield. But if we truly love Him we will do what He commands in the Bible. And my desire is to truly love Him. God is so good to us, and yet we find it so hard to do our best for Him and let Him take full control in our lives. He only wants what is best and He knows what is best. He gave His only Son to come to this horrible world to die for those who did not deserve His love or His pity. But He did He sent His precious, sinless Son to be born in a barn, to journey to a criminal's cross, to die for you and for me, the sinners in so much need of a Savior. In order to fully understand what love is, one must first acknowledge the love that was demonstrated on the hill of Calvary over 2000 years ago, and accept this man's gift of salvation. God is so good.

Also, I would like to thank the Lord for loving me. Just this past weekend I realized that the Lord always loves us the same. He always loves us the same. If we are obeying Him and reading our Bibles, praying, meditating, and doing all kinds of works for Him, He loves us so much. When we are not obeying Him all the time and are doing things that please the flesh and things that are self-centered, He still loves us the same. I many times have this feeling that when I am not exactly in sweet communion with God that He does not love me as much, but He does, His love is unconditional. And I would just like to tell Him thanks.

I am pretty pathetic! I have had a blog now for about a month, and I have never posted anything on it. I will try and change that.

The Lord is so good! Here in the past couple of weeks the Lord has been so merciful and kind! Not that He is not merciful and kind all of the time, but that these past couple of weeks the Lord has done great things in my life. I just want to thank Him for that. He has been so good to me. Many times I fail Him and yet He still loves me.


My pastor has been teaching Sunday School on the building blocks to a Christian home. I have really found his lessons to be a real blessing in my life. It has made me think more on how I want my family to be when I get married and start a family. I really think that every young person needs to hear this lesson, because it has so many points that apply to real life. It has really opened my eyes to the state of our country and world as a whole. The family is the basic building block to a nations success. A countries success and character are in the hands of the people. If they begin to fall apart the country will begin to fall apart also. My pastor's lesson applies mainly to the married adults, but it is helping me to prepare for the future. Even if our nation is falling apart at the seams, I want me and my family to be a stitch that holds strong, through whatever comes our nations way.